A whole lot of cleverness is going on. But craft is thrown to the wind too often for a song. Line two is just a disaster, structurally speaking. And why is that room so all alone in line eight. Licentious is as licentious does I suppose. On the other hand, the one note holds up pretty well throughout. It’s the marvelous metaphor extravaganza, and everything stays within script. And ultimately it’s just good clean fun and there’s nothing wrong with that. Nothing too exciting either.
[I want to build] by Friedrich Hölderlin
Simple but breathtaking. It overthrows the classics with just one common condition. And its universal revolutionary moment. Classical lines indeed. (Re-read half-hour later, and adding another half-snap. By tonight, this could make five.)
Dear Jim by Matthew Langley
Almost a 4-line haiku. It intimates but no one answers.
1 comment:
No kidding, breathtaking. Zen poetry from a 19th century German schizophrenic.
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