The first stanza is especially praiseworthy, the plain language describing a common sea scene with profound movement. The second stanza ain’t all that shabby either. Here the focus tightens on some details of cows with luxurious language: “wide slack mouths / dripping saliva in wet threads, / flesh-pink udders swinging heavy”. The third stanza brings it all back home very nicely. But for the limitation of the last line. It ends so passively. And possibly the exact intent of the poet. But I can’t help but feel that some active verb and not that weak ‘were’ could carry out such intent more forcefully.
New Year, with Nipperkin by Richard Kenney
So whip me good. I truly dislike this kind of light verse, the kind with capitals, the kind that is so knowingly droll. I know there’s an audience out there for this kind of precious performance, but why? Let’s reference Burns and coin a Larkin and insert a smiley at the end. With an awfully lame explanation to boot. Blech!
Regimen of Bouncing Back by Cynthia Arrieu-King
Ah! A complete poem on No-Tell again. And a pretty good one too. Others would handle this kind of emotion with a lyrical pretense but not this ‘girlfriend.’ Instead we have a more likely stance. Not reality exactly, but that conscious representation of one’s counter-reality, a socially introspective persona, media cool. But I like it. I like the conspiratorial naming of the ‘toothpaste fiasco.’ I like the laundry allusions. I like the gentle slap from the real friend. And I love the restorative leaf.
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