Wednesday, February 08, 2006

The Daily Poetry Show: Half-Blind Beauties

The Unlikely Landscape of Forgiveness by Margaret Szumowski
That’s quite a transition in the fourth line hanging on the word ‘still.’ Too abruptly analytical as well following all the tomatoes and corn. And although some of the unassuming language builds strong images, some of it doesn’t. Lastly, I’ve never seen red-winged blackbirds as vicious as the ones depicted here. Maybe the east coast variety are more mellow, man. All in all, this is a story that tries to tell a modest tale but ends up being a bit too melodramatic.

The View from Zero Bridge by Lynn Aarti Chandhok
This is a very photographic poem, which is apt since the poem is about a photographer. And as such, it’s highly visual with strong images full of action and texture. But the ending falls flat. Too much is assumed. Which might have worked. Lose the last two lines and maybe that air of mystery remains. Instead we’re spoon-fed “Morning’s gold film, laid thin across the lake.” Please, not another gilt trip.

Cost by Cynthia Arrieu-King
“Once in a while, the glib can't out-perform wishes”. Exactly. And sometimes the inner voice in this poem speaks volumes and sometimes it croaks a sour note or two. Like the second and third couplets for example. Why? Is it laziness or lost (on me) intent. At this point, I’m leaning to the former.

1 comment:

Simmons B. Buntin said...

I thought the last stanza of Chandhok's poem was a separate poem altogether. Fragmented.

Enjoying the minireviews quite a bit, thanks.